Strange But True: LIFE OF A WOMAN (3)
Life of a Woman is a real life experience of different Nigerian women who have found courage in sharing their stories across this platform, with the aim of inspiring other women into becoming better versions of themselves.
Let me officially welcome you to our weekly blog series of Strange But True – SBT on this platform of The Penvoice Blog, a brand of Penvoice Media.
We shall be sharing true life stories of Africans on this blog series weekly. SBT is solely to inspire you. Welcome!
This week on SBT, we will conclude this story today due to the request of our readers. Please, enjoy this inspiring piece, my amazing reader and let’s learn from it!
Life of a Woman Naija
I couldn’t remember when Boye had laughed with me. The only time he was ever calm was when he wanted sex. And after he was done, he would roll off not caring whether I was satisfied or not. I didn’t know what I did wrong that made him also changed towards me. Even if his family treated me badly, I didn’t expect Boye to join in. He was the one I married.
At this point, I was already low self esteem wise. I saw myself as nothing. The only person that I was a bit closer to in the house was the gate man. He had once asked me if I had any family. My mother passed on when I was in secondary school. I was the only child. And as long as my dad heard my voice on the phone that showed to him that I was okay, he was fine with that.
One day, I couldn’t even remember what had happened between Boye and I that made him slap me. He hit me so hard that I hit my head against the wall. I woke up at the hospital the next day. My husband had been by my bedside holding my hand. He said I had pushed his buttons too hard and that he was sorry.
Life of a Woman Naija
The third day after I got back from the hospital, I saw my father at our residence early in the morning along with three other young men. He couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw me. He just kept crying and asking why. The disappointment and tears I saw in his eyes made me look at myself with pity. I didn’t even know how thin I was until when he told me. He said life had left my face as he cried.
It was our gate man who had gone to Abeokuta secretly to inform my father it was high time he came for me before he lost me in a pathetic situation I called marriage. I knew he had once asked me where I lived in Abeokuta when he told me he was from there too.
My father told me that I was leaving there that day. Boye had gone to work. So did his older and the younger sister who had also gone to school. It was only the mother that was around. She couldn’t stop us as my father had started screaming and raining curses.
I had strength to file for divorce a year after. Today, looking back at what I went through, I didn’t know why I stayed. Maybe I thought it would be better. Also maybe I thought marriage was for better or worse and I started with my worse. Maybe I thought when the sisters got married and leave the house, I would be able to have my life back with my husband.
Life of a Woman Naija
I left with my dignity and my confidence shattered that took years to build back again. It’s been nine years. More so, I have a good job now with a good life. I don’t have a husband now, but I’m happy. I have a 4-year old son whom God brought into my life two years ago that I have officially adopted, and I am blessed.
Why am I sharing my story? To let other women know that marriage is not a do or die affair. Do not allow yourself to be subdue into slavery just because you are thinking, it’ll get better. I now thank God every single day for Sadiku (gateman) whom God had used to help me. If he had not intervened, maybe I wouldn’t have left. Even worse, I may have died of depression or otherwise. I also thank God for my father who pushed me to move out.
One of Boye’s sisters has passed on now, as I heard that she fell off the stairs at her husband’s house. Boye is married again with his wife still living in the house with his mother.
May God protect us all good women in and around the world.
Thank you to all my readers who have been supportive for three months since this blog came into existence.
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